Lately I've been analyzing how I treat homeless people. Well, maybe avoid is a better word. There are times when I find myself hiding my eyes from the men I see standing on the corner asking for help. There's something wrong with that.
Well, this past Sunday I met Bill. Bill was standing on the corner of Junction and Tryon roads holding a sign asking for help of any kind. I saw him while Joye and I were on our way to Wal-Mart to see if they were open on Easter Sunday*. I mentioned to Joye I was thinking about stopping to see if we could get him something to eat. She said she thought it was a good idea and then nothing else was said about it.
On our way back through Bill was still standing there. We approached the intersection and I began to brake. I looked at Bill, he looked at us. I waved, let off the brake and kept going. Crap. I chickened out. Joye just looked at me for the next minute or so with a half smile and eventually asked, "Why didn't you stop?" I sheepishly replied, "I don't know." I felt bad for about the next 15 seconds after which I turned the car around and went back to the intersection where Bill was.
We stopped and asked him if he'd like to have something to eat and that we were thinking of going to McDonald's. He replied, "Sure! I'm not picky. Everything's good to Bill!" and gave a big grin. We stopped by McDonald's and picked him up a value meal. He was so grateful that we brought him the food. As he walked away, assumably to find a nice shady spot to eat his meal, Joye said, "Aww, that's his Easter dinner." This made me sad. Later Joye told me she was proud of me. That was huge.
I wonder if it made much of a difference to Bill that we stopped. It certainly made a difference for me. Since then I've seen Cliff who sometimes stands on the corner of Garrett Rd. and University Dr. in Durham which I pass by every day on my way home from work. I stopped and asked if he'd like me to bring him some food the next day. He declined, but I did anyway. I could tell he was grateful. If Joye hadn't helped me to stop and talk to Bill I'm not sure if I would have stopped to talk to Cliff.
I want to challenge my preconceived notions of people. I want to see and treat people as Christ would. I want to be a person of compassion. I want to reserve judgment and give others the benefit of the doubt. I'll count this as a step forward.
* They weren't.
About Me
- Jeramie Mullis
- I'm glad to be loved by God, my wife, my family, and my friends.
6 comment(s):
Jeramie, it's awesome to see you growing in this area. It's inspiring!
If you see Bill again, give me a call. We'll all three go get something to eat together. It would be interesting to find out if he knows, and knows what happened to, Mark, the guy I met in that same area, who was at the time living in the woods right by there.
Keep up the good work.
Way to go with some guts Jeramie! I see a wall falling here, nice!
hey - i just have some additional info to add to the conversation. you might never see this since it's buried a few posts back, but here goes.
i think your Bill is the same guy i see on the corner of tryon and gorman several days a week. there have been several days when i've seen him fold up his sign, walk over to the light pole, pick up a bottle of liquor and his backpack and walk away. (for the record, i obviously know we all have our vices and our sins) i've also seen him coming out of a house a little further down tryon (which i don't know to be his house... just observing).
i'm not saying that you shouldn't feed him or give him money or whatever you want to do... maybe that is the first step in figuring out something to do to really help the guy with a deeper issue that apparently exists in his life. clearly you can't know what his needs are if you don't talk with him, so great job on taking that first step. but i think if a difference is really going to be made, there has to be something else too. this can't be the last step (which according to your title you didn't intend it to be the last step). i don't know what the next step is - maybe it's different for every homeless person. i think we try and generalize a solution for what is probably a different and personal issue for every different person.
i don't know this guy's situation - in fact, you probably know it better than i do since you've talked with him. since you have talked with him, i would love it if you could tell me if feeding Bill a meal is actually helping him, or if it's enabling some other behavior that keeps him on the street. just a question. i don't have the answer to it. maybe for him it's not enabling...i don't know. just something to consider as we try and figure out what we can do to help others.
i hope this doesn't upset anyone... i just want to add to the discuss a different viewpoint. that's all.
No, the guy at the corner of Tryon and Gorman is Willie.
thanks for joining the conversation rebecca. i've decided my response will come in the form of another post. stay tuned.
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